THE PARABLE OF THE BAMBOO SUIT
A simple truth hidden in plain sight: to get what you want, help others get what they need.
Once, a king threw a feast. The only rule? Everyone had to wear a rigid bamboo suit—no bending allowed. The rich came. The wise came. All left starving. Then the poor came. They ate their fill. How? They fed each other.
This story has stuck with me for decades—not as folklore, but as a practical mindset shift. One I’ve applied in every part of my life. And if you’re reading this, it’s likely because you’re either wondering how to create your own better world—or you’re already on the path and want to go further.
The Bamboo Suit Principle in Real Life
Let’s bring this story back down to earth:
In Business:
- Are you feeding your customers—giving them what they truly want—or just trying to feed yourself?
- Are your employees growing through your business, or are they just trading time for a paycheck?
- Do you expect loyalty from suppliers without giving them a reason to prioritise you?
In Work (if you’re employed):
- Are you genuinely helping your employer succeed—or quietly collecting a wage with minimum energy?
- Would your employer say you’ve made their life easier, or harder?
In Personal Relationships:
- Are you feeding your partner, family, or friends emotionally and practically—or expecting them to meet your needs while you check out?
- Do you even know what they want—or have you assumed?
Everyone wants to be fed. Few start feeding.
Why We Don’t Feed Each Other
It’s rarely because we’re selfish. More often, it’s because:
- We were never taught how to give well.
- We don’t trust others to feed us.
- We’re scared of rejection or disappointment.
- We’re starving ourselves—and desperate.
Men especially: we’re conditioned to never ask. We’re supposed to always “have it sorted.” So we never learn how to ask for help. Which means we never fully learn how to give it either.
What Feeding Others Demands
Feeding others isn’t a feel-good slogan. It’s a choice. One that demands:
- Listening to what actually matters to others.
- Letting go of past betrayals, unmet needs, and any assumptions of other people’s needs.
- Trusting again. Even when it’s hard.
It’s not easy. But neither is starving.
As Chuck Palahniuk once said, “Hoard food and it rots. Hoard money and you rot. Hoard power and the nation rots.” What we keep dies. What we give grows.
Life Is Still Gonna Be Hard
Life doesn’t care what you choose … The hard path of connection (feeding others) or the hard path of isolation (not feeding others)—they’re both hard. But only one creates momentum.
So the real question becomes:
- Do you want the hard of being alone, guarded, unsupported?
- Or the hard of showing up, giving first, and trusting the long game?
Using the Bamboo Suit Strategy in Business
Want your business to thrive? Here’s how to feed the people who matter:
- Customers: Learn what they actually want (as opposed to what you think they should get). Give them more value than they expect. Price is what they pay. Value is what they get. – Warren Buffett
- Employees: Help them become more than task-doers. Make your business a place they grow—not just a place they grind.
- Suppliers: Collaborate. Don’t command. Respect their role in your delivery engine.
Feed them well, and they’ll feed your business right back.
Using the Bamboo Suit Strategy in Personal Life
Want better relationships?
- Communicate: Tell people what you need. Ask them what they need.
- Choose well: Don’t keep feeding people who never feed you. Reciprocity matters.
- Forgive: Yourself. Others. The past. No one can feed with clenched fists.
And remember: people can’t read your mind. If you want to be fed, you need to speak up.
Final Word: Stop Waiting. Start Feeding.
Don’t wait for governments, clients, partners, friends—or fate.
Be the one who makes the first move. Be the one who listens and gives. Be the one who teaches people how to feed you by how you feed them.
As Hunter S. Thompson put it, “Decide how you want to live, and then see what you can do to make a living within that way of life.”
Make it your business to start feeding those around you.
And if you need help using this in your business or life—or just want to learn more about how you can build your own better world through better business—let’s talk. (Remember: you have to give to get.)
– Brydon, Your Personal Small Business Trainer